I’m finally happy. You can’t take that away from me.

June 24th, 2022

Hi, how are you doing? I hope you’re well.

I want to tell you about my life recently.

On May 24th, 2022 I embarked on a journey across the U.S.; I traveled through the rockies to the grand canyon, the giant sequoias and now to Seattle. My two final stops on this quest to find meaning are Boise and San Francisco.

I started out with my brother, but quickly realized that we had differing opinions, beliefs, and personalities…a lot of them. Some of my beliefs are very personal to me and when the time came, we parted ways and I began my solo journey up the west coast. The purpose of this trip for me was to find out why the hell I am a human on this earth. While I may not 100% know yet, and maybe I do know but don’t know how to put it into words, but I do know this: I will come back changed.

I am adopting a modern day hippie lifestyle and mindset, and I couldn’t be happier. This past week I have felt the most free and happy that I have ever felt in my life. I’ve been happy before, sure, but that was for moments: a night here, a birthday there. But this is the first time in my 19 years on this planet that I have felt happy and good for an extended period of time. It feels good to feel good. Most days I wake up when I want. I roll out of bed when I feel like it, get dressed in colors rather than black and grey, and explore cities on my own and do whatever the hell I want because I am here and that’s enough.

My life calls in a week and a half and while I don’t want to go back to reality, I can continue to dream and do the things I want to because I can. I’ve got a folk music festival the weekend after I come back and three concerts in September to look forward to.

Life is what I make of it. I may be tied down to a job in order to pay the bills, but my soul and heart can never be tamed. I refuse to let society tear me down any more than it already has. My values are important, and so am I. I will dress how I want, act how I want, listen to the music I want, and be exactly what I want. I am going to come home different: in what I wear, how I act, my mindset, and what I prioritize.

[Edit on 6/28/22: I figured out why I’m here. I’ve learned that I get to be here, I am here because I choose to be. I am here and I get to help those who are not in a position to or do not have the resources to help themselves. I will be volunteering for organizations such as planned parenthood in addition to getting a steady job for income. My job is most likely not going to be fulfilling for me, but volunteering and standing up to protect our rights is something that will actually have meaning for me. That is my purpose. I control my life, the world does not and will never be able to control me. Not my mind, my body, my appearance, nothing. I am a hippie, a traveler, a dreamer, a writer, a poet, somebody who finds meaning beyond what society deems necessary for life, and so so so much more. I will not be controlled. I will not be contained. I am unapologetically me, so fuck you supreme court.]

These are my airport thoughts as I wait for my flight out of Seattle. I’m on to better things…✈️

Love,

Stan (they/them/theirs)